Shoulda, Coulda, Woulda…

should-would-could-didWow, we are already knee deep into February! It seems as if just yesterday we were celebrating New Year’s Day! I wanted to check in with you to see how your New Year’s resolutions are going? Did you make any?  If so, what was the promise you made?

“I’ll give up sugar this year.”

“I’ll do yoga every day.”

“I want to start making more time for me.”

They all sound great, right? Now that we are six weeks into 2014, do you find yourself saying…

“I haven’t been eating sugar but I did have some cake this week.”

“IF I worked out more, I would feel even better.”

“I CAN’T find enough time for myself since I started this promotion.”

Notice something important? Is it the resolution that isn’t working for you or is it simply how you are looking at it?

It’s amazing how easy it is to tell ourselves what we did wrong, what we failed to do. Yet, how many of us remember what we DID do. You started a new goal, right? Instead of throwing in the towel after your first slip-up, why not tell yourself: “Wow! Two whole weeks without sugar! That felt great! Let’s see how long I can go this time and see if I can avoid that birthday cake next time.” Now having told yourself that, I think the odds of you continuing with that goal rather than just giving up are pretty good, don’t you?

It’s as simple as acknowledging what we DID do rather than just what we didn’t do. These are what I call our WINS. Your wins are all the positive things you are doing to change your habits and lifestyle. And it all starts with the way you are thinking and feeling about them.

So often we end up phrasing things with: “I did accomplish X,Y,Z, BUT didn’t…” It’s so important in those moments for us to, instead, just make the statement and leave out all the could have, would have, should have’s.

“I exercised yesterday, BUT I didn’t today.”  can become:

“I exercised yesterday and I WILL exercise again this week.”

Do you hear the difference? Which one of those sentences actually makes you most likely to work out again? Which one is more empowering?

So…no buts. Period!

Be encouraged by the accomplishments you are making. And most importantly, pay attention to the words you are using when talking about them. The words themselves, even when you are trying to use them positively, can have negative energy. Think about the way you’re saying things from an energetic standpoint. Stick with the positive statement and be aware of the If and But statements – just leave them out of it!

When we beat ourselves up, we drain our energy, lower our immune system and deplete the feel good hormones.  That’s when resolutions can be detrimental to your health.

Focus on what you’re actually accomplishing without bringing in the words that will trip you up and prevent you from feeling good about it. So just rate how your self-talk sounds on a scale of 1-10.  Say each phrase, first the way you would normally say it and then from a more empowered standpoint.  How does it feel?  Does it pull your energy down or up?  Is it healing or hurting you?

Here’s the other thing, I don’t believe in waiting until January to make “resolutions” or changes.  Just decide and set the ball in motion.  Decide on one step and do it consistently. If you dropped off from your commitment, recommit.  It’s that simple.

Believe me, just as important as acting on that new year’s goal is the way you think about it. So why not make today the first day of the rest of your life?

So what are you doing to accomplish your goals?  What language will you use to support yourself?  Oh and we’d love to hear from you so don’t forget to share your comments below!

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